My Solution to Immigration Problem

[Rupert Pupkin]

I think that the problem with illegal immigration is out of control. Something should have obviously been done a long time ago. But at this point, we have to accept the situation that we're in and figure out how to deal with it.

It's not realistic or practical to deport 15 million people. The truth of the matter is we actually need a lot of them. I don't know how many we need. I don't think we neeed 15 million of them but we probably need 5-10 million. If they all left, tons of businesses would close. Practically every restaurant would close until all new people were hired. There would be no horseracing until all new people were hired. We would be in big trouble if all the illegal immigrants left.

Anyway at this point I think the first thing we need to do is seal the border to make sure that no more illegal immigrants come here.

The ones that are already here should be allowed to stay provided that they are employed and they have no felony convictions. We don't need to make them citizens. We can just give them a temporary work card that they would all be required to have. We could charge them around $150 a year for the work card. That would generate some money for the government. If you multiply 15 million people x $150 that would generate $2.5 billion a year.

We could make it a serious crime for any business to hire an alien that doesn't have one of these work cards.

I think this plan would be good for a number of reasons. One good thing that it would do is separate the workers from the criminals. Anyone convicted of a felony would be deported and wold not be eligible to get a work card. So we would have nothing but law-abiding immigrants that are here to work.