My Onion wannabe article

[GBBob]

thud

BEARS INSIST THEY ARE IN PLAYOFFS

Although mathematically eliminated from the NFL's post season tournament, the Chicago Bears are making plans to travel to New Orleans to play the Saints Saturday night.

" We are getting a good week of work in and feel ready" Coach Lovie Smith commented. "It will be a hostile environment but we know we can compete with this team."

When asked how his team will be able to play since the Detroit Lions are scheduled, Coach Smith briskly said " We'll deal with that when we get there" When pressed for further comment, he alluded " The Bears deserve to be in the playoffs. We had multiple injuries that cost us victories and were further hampered by Jerry Angelo's inept drafting. Based on this, we feel confident that it should be us instead of Detroit and therefore will be dressed and ready"

The Bears plan to leave Friday morning and have a walk-thru practice in their hotel ballroom Saturday morning. Rather than dress at the Superdome since locker room space will be at a premium, Smith acknowledged " We will have to make some adjustments. We will dress in our hotel rooms and then stretch in the hotel lobby. We will also utilize the hotel shuttle and should have all players to the field by kick off."

Finally, Smith was asked what they would do if refused admittance and he said "We are confident the NFL and New Orleans Saints will understand our position and replace the Lions with us. If not, we will fly straight to NY and report to Giants Stadium to face the Falcons on Sunday"