The Worst Date You've Been On

[AeWingnut]

Happy shiny people

[hoovesupsideyourhead]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

Cute couple, and I like her dress!

hes a dream boat..looks like john marzack!!!!lolollol

[ArlJim78]

Originally Posted by hi_im_god

this is fairly personal and may not apply to everyone but i've come up with a list of 3 signs the date isn't going to be what i wanted based on my own experience:

1) starts a fight with a homeless person.

or

2) casually mentions she's still living with ex-husband.

or

3) advises she's never had an orgasm "with a man".

those are good hig. how about

4) at dinner mentions that the food is "much better than that crap they serve in the pen"

5) reveals that she was the founder of the Lorena Bobbitt fan club.

[Cajungator26]

Originally Posted by hoovesupsideyourhead

hes a dream boat..looks like john marzack!!!!lolollol

Oh boy.

[Indian Charlie]

my worst date story is going to be hard to beat.

this happened way back around 1996 when i was on aol and would IM chicks that had interesting profiles.

i Im'd this one chick that lived up in the san francisco area (I lived in LA). we chatted for a few months online and would also call each other several times a week on the phone. she seemed like a pretty cool chick and it felt like we were both into each other. hell, i even sent her a gift while I was down in costa rica for a couple of weeks, which really made her happy!

so, eventually, we decide to meet. i made it pretty clear i'm not into partying anymore and that i'm basically a pretty quiet and shy guy and that i prefer to do things either on a one on one basis or in very small groups. she seemed to dig it and presented herself as being like minded as well.

so, i fly up and she meets me at the airport with her girl friend (female friend morty, not lesbian lover). no big deal to me, as we've never met, and women are generally pretty paranoid, so i wasn't bothered by that.

we then leave the airport and Pam pulls over at a liquor store to place a phone call on a pay phone. again, no big deal. as we are driving around the area with the two of them rocking out to some Jewel song, pam asks me if i mind that she stops at her dealers place to pick up some pot for this weekend's party that she's throwing! I'm like, 'uh, ok'.

what i didnt realize (due to a severe lack of communication skills on her part) was that she had invited ALL of her friends over to her house for a two day party the weekend I was up there! Everyone was getting drunk, stoned and more than a few were doing coke. I spent most of the first day and night upstairs with her young son playing some nintendo games, and i hate nintendo games!

i finally managed to fall asleep in the quietest room in the house, which was a bathroom tucked away somewhere upstairs. when i got up, the party was still going on as strong as it was the day before. i played some more video games that day with the kid, and pretty much was a dick to anyone else who came near me, especially pam. back then, i was a hell of a lot more sarcastic than i am now and was also pretty well trained in mixed martial arts (think cage fighting), so nobody really messed with me back. all in all, it created an atmosphere of a mutual hatred.

now, as bad as things were, this is where it really got fun.

you see, pam lived in a suburb of SF called colma. colma is known as the only city or town in the country that has more dead people in it than living. this is because of some weird law from back in the day that designated colma be the receptacle for dead people for that entire area.

at around 11pm the second night, i decided to go for a walk around town and view some gravestones to cheer myself up. i was gone for around two hours or so, and as i was approaching pam's house, i could hear the party still raging on and on.

then, as i got nearer to the house, a deathly stillness and silence enveloped the night. when i got to the driveway, it got so quiet you could hear the proverbial pin drop. perplexed, i worked my way to the door, where i found all my belongings (suitcase and backpack) out on the porch!

i laughed and thanked them for a good time, thus finding myself homeless at 1 am on a friday night in a town full of dead people. it was surreal, to say the least.

a few days later, when i made it back home, she emailed me asking if i could send her her pictures back to her. upon receiving them, she actually thanked me for not coloring her teeth black!

reading a story like sal's little brother pulling his future wife's pants down in school really makes me wonder how sane women are, let me tell you!

[Indian Charlie]

come to think of it, that night i stayed at sal's house in PA while driving from CA to maine was a pretty weird date too!

between my girlfriend of the time screaming at me on the phone for no readily apparent reason (i called her saying i missed her and she responded by saying i was being mean) and the great drugS talking about horses for 9 straight hours then going off for a jog at 2 AM, that was a weird 'date'!

but i digress.

[The Indomitable DrugS]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

as we are driving around the area with the two of them rocking out to some Jewel song,

At this point --- using your "cage fighting" background --- you should have pulled them out of the car by their hair one at a time, roundhouse kicked their asses, confiscated all there money and weed, and drove off.

That's what Discreet Cat would have done.

If Jesus wears bracelets that read WWDCD --- why shouldn't you?

[Sightseek]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

reading a story like sal's little brother pulling his future wife's pants down in school really makes me wonder how sane women are, let me tell you!

Oh and men are very sane for doing it?!

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by The Indomitable DrugS

At this point --- using your "cage fighting" background --- you should have pulled them out of the car by their hair one at a time, roundhouse kicked their asses, confiscated all there money and weed, and drove off.

That's what Discreet Cat would have done.

If Jesus wears bracelets that read WWDCD --- why shouldn't you?

discreet cat probably wouldn't have been stupid enough to get in the car in the first place.

he strikes me as a horse that has a keenly high intelligence.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

Oh and men are very sane for doing it?!

well, yeah. polite or nice? no!

obviously his brother figured out at an early age that women respond more favorably to men/boys who treat them like crap then they do to guys who treat them nicely and with respect.

of course, not all women are like that. just all the ones i've ever met, and all the ones my friends and acquaintances have ever met.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by The Indomitable DrugS

If Jesus wears bracelets that read WWDCD --- why shouldn't you?

By the way, ever since i found out that jesus wears these bracelets, i've looked all over the internet for these things, but alas, my search has come up empty.

since you hold the rights to these things, would you mind sending me at least one pair?

[Sightseek]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

well, yeah. polite or nice? no!

obviously his brother figured out at an early age that women respond more favorably to men/boys who treat them like crap then they do to guys who treat them nicely and with respect.

of course, not all women are like that. just all the ones i've ever met, and all the ones my friends and acquaintances have ever met.

Yeah, but at the same time, men can never find a woman who is skinny enough or boobs that are too big.

[Sightseek]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

By the way, ever since i found out that jesus wears these bracelets, i've looked all over the internet for these things, but alas, my search has come up empty.

since you hold the rights to these things, would you mind sending me at least one pair?

DrugS does not share anything that he has in his Discreet Cat Shrine.

[GPK]

Not enough time or space to talk about the myriad of bad dates I have been on.


Im a magnet for thrice married women with at least three kids. Its a curse.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

Yeah, but at the same time, men can never find a woman who is skinny enough or boobs that are too big.

i disagree with that, at least for me and most of my male friends.

sal excluded of course.

damn, there's one of those clever little shots i keep taking at him!

anyways, as far as women and looks are concerned, it's my philosophy that when you are both 70, you arent going to give 2 craps about how your spouse looks. you'll be much more concerned about the quality of the person you've spent your life with.

women, on the other hand, are concerned about things like whether or not a man is a 'good catch', to quote a recent post i saw on here

[Sightseek]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

i disagree with that, at least for me and most of my male friends.

sal excluded of course.

damn, there's one of those clever little shots i keep taking at him!

anyways, as far as women and looks are concerned, it's my philosophy that when you are both 70, you arent going to give 2 craps about how your spouse looks. you'll be much more concerned about the quality of the person you've spent your life with.

women, on the other hand, are concerned about things like whether or not a man is a 'good catch', to quote a recent post i saw on here

oooooh, another clever little shot
That came out wrong...what I meant was that he didn't seem to be the tool he turned out to be.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

DrugS does not share anything that he has in his Discreet Cat Shrine.

while generally i would agree with your assessment that Sal is one of the cheapest human beings alive (BTW will verify this too), i believe that in this instance, he'd be more than happy to share, since it will help spread the gospel truth about discreet god, i mean cat.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

oooooh, another clever little shot
That came out wrong...what I meant was that he didn't seem to be the tool he turned out to be.

wow, i'm not sure how to take this one.

tool as in someone or something you can use?

or tool as used synonymously with the word ahole or dick?

if the former meaning, then wow! i hope that was sarcasm on your part!

if the latter, he sure seemed like a tool to me!

[Sightseek]

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

wow, i'm not sure how to take this one.

tool as in someone or something you can use?

or tool as used synonymously with the word ahole or dick?

if the former meaning, then wow! i hope that was sarcasm on your part!

if the latter, he sure seemed like a tool to me!

The latter.

The problem was, in the professional setting he was very different than the person he was outside of work therefore, I was a bit surprised by the way he truly was.

[Indian Charlie]

Originally Posted by Sightseek

The latter.

The problem was, in the professional setting he was very different than the person he was outside of work therefore, I was a bit surprised by the way he truly was.

why would you be surprised?

i'd be more surprised if he hadnt been a tool outside of his professional life.

by the way, that's a pretty cute photo in your avatar.

who's that affectionate horse? and is that you the horse is snuggling up to?