the cozy dooryard - Page 12

clyde · #**221** 03-14-2010, 09:26 PM

!!

Probably better.

Rileyoriley · #**222** 03-14-2010, 09:30 PM

Glad I don't have to buy replacement raccoons. The recession has hit the raccoon market.

geeker2 · #**223** 03-14-2010, 10:41 PM

Attachment 1449

Please don't shoot me

clyde · #**224** 03-15-2010, 06:25 AM

My imaginary friend's cousin-in-law died last night.

I shot him.

clyde · #**225** 03-15-2010, 06:25 AM

Sightseek · #**226** 03-15-2010, 09:13 PM

I've been a very good board buddy..

I got you two new racoons.

Amish racoons.

clyde · #**227** 03-15-2010, 11:35 PM

Oh.

You certainly have.

Thanks so much.

thud

clyde · #**228** 03-15-2010, 11:50 PM

Well anyways,no one has shot me.

Not to say it's not coming,but so far--so good.

Interesting note:I must sign in every morning at this hospital in order to recieve a badge saying I'm clean.In exchange they wanted my drivers license in case I abscond with the 25 cent badge.

I gave them my ,"Uh,no." face.

Really a dumb rule and I did beat it.

They now take my Kohl's card which is canceled so what do I care? They don't know it and think they have something of value when it's about as valuable as a Twatter...I mean Twitter account.

But there is one great,true story about the Kohl's card you simply must know,dahlings.

Tune in tomorrow night..you won't want to miss this one.

Nighty-poo-kins.

clyde · #**229** 03-17-2010, 11:33 PM

Sorry this is yet to post, suffering from vapor lock.

But I'm still alive ,although someone did take a shot at me. It missed and a duck took the bullet while flying at about 80 feet.

Had to be Cheney.

I did shoot back ,but missed --only grazed a fence post.....or it may have been Oinkman.

Hard to tell the difference.

clyde · #**230** 03-18-2010, 10:59 PM

I'm eating a cinnamon muffin..I'm eating a cinnamon muffin...

..HA-HA..HA..HA-HA

clyde · #**231** 03-19-2010, 08:14 PM

Pick any whole number that you wish.

Double it.

Add 8.

Divide by two.

Subtract your original number.

Your answer is 4.

More magic from the Amazing MORTE'.

herkhorse · #**232** 03-19-2010, 08:46 PM

I just spent a little time in that there politics room and I tell you what. I'd rather hide in here than listen to those loonies.

oh, and I'm armed.

I can do a few chores too.

what?

OK I'll leave

clyde · #**233** 03-19-2010, 08:55 PM

The one you least expect is the one to shoot you....I'd forgotten that.

But the nincompoops arguing their political bent are out there,aye?

herkhorse · #**234** 03-19-2010, 09:00 PM

I always sleep with one eye open.

clyde · #**235** 03-19-2010, 09:05 PM

Odd name.

Anyhoo.....I will be bringing you fine Florida Derby analysis this evening.

Viewers will race to this thread.

Thank you sssssso much.

herkhorse · #**236** 03-19-2010, 09:09 PM

The only horse missing from the Fla. Derby is Joe The Dude

clyde · #**237** 03-19-2010, 09:31 PM

Fine work.

How abut Dude-Ah?

Another form of doo dah.

Not that good,I guess.

What's missing from this race is any hint of intrigue;it fails to do so, lacks pizazz,no wow factor and what have you.

As a girl found to be wearing the bandy aid bra gives you no reason to take it off. But that's Florida;where ancient people go to die.

TheSpyder · #**238** 03-19-2010, 11:00 PM

clyde · #**239** 03-19-2010, 11:06 PM

Today's cards have been sent by Andy Sirloin's Short Sighted Courier Service.I just received them via Mrs.CM Oreo-Serling's Corn Truck.

Ah dunno.

Anyhoo...heah we go with yer Florida Stinking Derby:

1...SnoringVampire

Oh boy.

Have an idea.

nyoooooow

thud

2...Len Tenor

What in God's name is a Jewish singer doing in a horsey race?? Truly an outrage.

Crinkle..

trash can.

3...Pul-sion

Phoo-ey.

Crinkle..

trash can

4...PleathantPrinth

Now,just a minute here.

Since when are dressage horsey's allowed to mix with thoroughbreds?Honest--I think the dressers would even be embarrassed.

whiiiiiirrrrr

5...GameOnDude

Hang Ten!!

God.

Crinkle...

trash can

6...

Uh oh...ah did it again.

But oh well.

7...Mule

This is getting ridiculous.

Crinkle..

trash can.

8...IceBox

=:>

9...MinersReserve

Wouldn't it be more fun right now to talk about anything else?Once I get passed 8 horsey's I kind of lose interest.I think they do ,too.

Squirt!! :,..;;"",,.

Ah squirted him with mustard.

Was fun.

10...BestActor

Fine and dandy, but WorstHorsey.

whiiiirrrrrr!!

11...RadioHead

Think of the possibilities.

Since I don't want to get darted, I will only think them.

I could say RadioGa-Ga...I guess.

All the same.........

Crinkle..

trash can

IceBox.

Wok Good.

clyde · #**240** 03-19-2010, 11:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheSpyder

Please...no Friends of Oinkman photos.