Advice from Scav

Scav · #1 06-02-2006, 12:28 PM

NEVER LET A WOMAN TAKE CARE OF AN EVENT THAT IS CO-RECREATIONAL.

I am in this co-rec softball league where you have to have 5 girls and 5 guys. We have 16 people on this team and everyone is expecting to play. My two sisters were both all area in softball and I am was all area in baseball, we are pretty good. I am usually my 'group' leader in that I plan alot of the things that my friends and I take part of. They give me ideas and I run with them.

Well, I was lazy with this one and I let one of our girl-friends take care of it. OH MAN!!! Now this chick played softball also so the reason we let her do it is becuase she thought she had a clue. Last week, she told our friend to play 3B. SHE LITERALLY STOOD on 3b. Now I was pitching because I can fall back and still get a ton of action but it was just a friggin circus

So this Monday I am like "listen, you really need to let me take control of this circus because we are not goign to win a game, and we should be winning this league"

Get into a serious tyraid how I am a jerkoff and all this crap on how everyone has to play and this and that.

SO BOOTLEG, ready to tell her to take this mushball and shove it up her rear end.

Suffolk Shippers · #2 06-04-2006, 09:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scav

NEVER LET A WOMAN TAKE CARE OF AN EVENT THAT IS CO-RECREATIONAL.

I am in this co-rec softball league where you have to have 5 girls and 5 guys. We have 16 people on this team and everyone is expecting to play. My two sisters were both all area in softball and I am was all area in baseball, we are pretty good. I am usually my 'group' leader in that I plan alot of the things that my friends and I take part of. They give me ideas and I run with them.

Well, I was lazy with this one and I let one of our girl-friends take care of it. OH MAN!!! Now this chick played softball also so the reason we let her do it is becuase she thought she had a clue. Last week, she told our friend to play 3B. SHE LITERALLY STOOD on 3b. Now I was pitching because I can fall back and still get a ton of action but it was just a friggin circus

So this Monday I am like "listen, you really need to let me take control of this circus because we are not goign to win a game, and we should be winning this league"

Get into a serious tyraid how I am a jerkoff and all this crap on how everyone has to play and this and that.

SO BOOTLEG, ready to tell her to take this mushball and shove it up her rear end.

friggen broads

Indian Charlie · #3 08-27-2007, 07:57 PM

what the hell are you playing rec softball for? in california, when i was an umpire (more like scapegoat and target dummy) for adult rec softball, there was a statewide rule that did not permit anyone with an IQ of over zero to play.

seriously, softball players are the most emotionally stunted and brain damaged people alive. i liken them to zombies who need to eat brains for no apparent reason.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scav

NEVER LET A WOMAN TAKE CARE OF AN EVENT THAT IS CO-RECREATIONAL.

I am in this co-rec softball league where you have to have 5 girls and 5 guys. We have 16 people on this team and everyone is expecting to play. My two sisters were both all area in softball and I am was all area in baseball, we are pretty good. I am usually my 'group' leader in that I plan alot of the things that my friends and I take part of. They give me ideas and I run with them.

Well, I was lazy with this one and I let one of our girl-friends take care of it. OH MAN!!! Now this chick played softball also so the reason we let her do it is becuase she thought she had a clue. Last week, she told our friend to play 3B. SHE LITERALLY STOOD on 3b. Now I was pitching because I can fall back and still get a ton of action but it was just a friggin circus

So this Monday I am like "listen, you really need to let me take control of this circus because we are not goign to win a game, and we should be winning this league"

Get into a serious tyraid how I am a jerkoff and all this crap on how everyone has to play and this and that.

SO BOOTLEG, ready to tell her to take this mushball and shove it up her rear end.

Cajungator26 · #4 08-27-2007, 08:01 PM

I'm the 'coach' for our annual Battle of the Brokerages softball game that my company participates in every February. I haven't had any complaints the past two years and I'm a broad...

Indian Charlie · #5 08-27-2007, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajungator26

I'm the 'coach' for our annual Battle of the Brokerages softball game that my company participates in every February. I haven't had any complaints the past two years and I'm a broad...

i'll leave the obvious HO jokes to others, but if i may comment on your observation, a one or two game get together is an entirely different animal than the rec softball leagues that are populated by no-lifers who's worlds end with every call that goes against them, every lost game they shoulda won, every ball that was a strike, every strike that was a ball and so on.

one of my favorite examples was when i asked this woman to remove her earring as she came to bat. I explained to her that this was a league rule that certain types of jewelry were potentially dangerous and for their own safety, blah blah blah. She was about to comply peacefully when her idiot manager came storming up to me and at point blank range started yelling at me that this rule violated her religious beliefs and was a breach of her constitutional rights.

I ejected the moron out of the game and the nice woman took the earring off with a confused sheepish look on her face.

One incident I enjoyed immensely was when I was watching my friend umpire a game. There was this one super uptight A-type personality born again playing that always flew off the handle at any close call that went against him. He was the type that would SCREAM at the top of his lungs while his face turns red and veins in the forehead would start to pulsate like they are about to blow.

This night he chose to pitch, and my friend, who like all of us, despised this guy, decided to give him a bad night. About one or two times per inning, my friend would call a pitch high when it wasn't or flat when it wasn't. You could see the rage in this guys eyes and you could also tell he was being messed with. I was sitting behind the home plate area watching and I was laughing my ass off quite visibly and loudly.

My friend refused to take any offense at this guy complaining, and soon enough he just shut up as he realized there was no hope for him. My friend this whole time was stone faced, but would turn around once awhile and wink at me. I haven't laughed so hard since being arrested once!

Anyways, eventually this guy couldn't take it. After three bad pitch calls in the same at bat, he took the ball back from the catcher and just stood on the mound glaring at my friend for about 15 seconds. He turned fire engine red and then yelled out "Fucl< this, I can't take it anymore!" and threw the ball straight down and stomped off to play first base. If i had had a video camera with me, I'd have won 100k by submitting that video to one of those cheesy tv shows!

Cajungator26 · #6 08-27-2007, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Am I the only one that noticed this was from June of last year?

Yep. Oops.

Indian Charlie · #7 08-27-2007, 08:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Am I the only one that noticed this was from June of last year?

yeah, i noticed that too!

what's up with that cajun!

Mortimer · #8 08-27-2007, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Am I the only one that noticed this was from June of last year?

I'm still noticing the Irish girl.

Is her zipper unzipped or have I been chewing too much sen sen?

Cajungator26 · #9 08-27-2007, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

i'll leave the obvious HO jokes to others, but if i may comment on your observation, a one or two game get together is an entirely different animal than the rec softball leagues that are populated by no-lifers who's worlds end with every call that goes against them, every lost game they shoulda won, every ball that was a strike, every strike that was a ball and so on.

one of my favorite examples was when i asked this woman to remove her earring as she came to bat. I explained to her that this was a league rule that certain types of jewelry were potentially dangerous and for their own safety, blah blah blah. She was about to comply peacefully when her idiot manager came storming up to me and at point blank range started yelling at me that this rule violated her religious beliefs and was a breach of her constitutional rights.

I ejected the moron out of the game and the nice woman took the earring off with a confused sheepish look on her face.

One incident I enjoyed immensely was when I was watching my friend umpire a game. There was this one super uptight A-type personality born again playing that always flew off the handle at any close call that went against him. He was the type that would SCREAM at the top of his lungs while his face turns red and veins in the forehead would start to pulsate like they are about to blow.

This night he chose to pitch, and my friend, who like all of us, despised this guy, decided to give him a bad night. About one or two times per inning, my friend would call a pitch high when it wasn't or flat when it wasn't. You could see the rage in this guys eyes and you could also tell he was being messed with. I was sitting behind the home plate area watching and I was laughing my ass off quite visibly and loudly.

My friend refused to take any offense at this guy complaining, and soon enough he just shut up as he realized there was no hope for him. My friend this whole time was stone faced, but would turn around once awhile and wink at me. I haven't laughed so hard since being arrested once!

Anyways, eventually this guy couldn't take it. After three bad pitch calls in the same at bat, he took the ball back from the catcher and just stood on the mound glaring at my friend for about 15 seconds. He turned fire engine red and then yelled out "Fucl< this, I can't take it anymore!" and threw the ball straight down and stomped off to play first base. If i had had a video camera with me, I'd have won 100k by submitting that video to one of those cheesy tv shows!

OK, I get the point.

This one time at band camp... I...

Indian Charlie · #10 08-27-2007, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cajungator26

OK, I get the point.

This one time at band camp... I...

Do tell! All us dudes on here enjoy cajun stories, rumors and innuendos!

except for maybe sniper.

Cajungator26 · #11 08-27-2007, 08:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

yeah, i noticed that too!

what's up with that cajun!

Hey, you're the one who responded to it first.

Cajungator26 · #12 08-27-2007, 08:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

Do tell! All us dudes on here enjoy cajun stories, rumors and innuendos!

except for maybe sniper.

Not sure there are any rumors left, although I'm sure that Mortician will come up with something soon.

Indian Charlie · #13 08-27-2007, 08:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DaHoss9698

Don't make me sick Pgardn on you.

go for it!

i learned to handle any and all teachers i've ever had ever since one of them tried to foist this fairy tale story off on me about this guy back a long time ago that somehow managed to stick 2 of each type of animal on this big ass boat back when there was this crazy flood. when i asked if the tigers ate the gazelle, i could literally hear the gears grind to a halt in her head.

i think i was about 5 at the time. from that moment on, i knew to treat anything they 'taught' me with great suspicion!

Scav · #14 08-27-2007, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

what the hell are you playing rec softball for? in california, when i was an umpire (more like scapegoat and target dummy) for adult rec softball, there was a statewide rule that did not permit anyone with an IQ of over zero to play.

seriously, softball players are the most emotionally stunted and brain damaged people alive. i liken them to zombies who need to eat brains for no apparent reason.

Um, this was like 14 months ago

Cajungator26 · #15 08-27-2007, 08:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Indian Charlie

go for it!

i learned to handle any and all teachers i've ever had ever since one of them tried to foist this fairy tale story off on me about this guy back a long time ago that somehow managed to stick 2 of each type of animal on this big ass boat back when there was this crazy flood. when i asked if the tigers ate the gazelle, i could literally hear the gears grind to a halt in her head.

i think i was about 5 at the time. from that moment on, i knew to treat anything they 'taught' me with great suspicion!

You learned that? I learned to not take everything literally and to interpret it in my own way... it seems that having faith is a thing of the past.